What Is Love?

 Eastern Parkway United Methodist Church 

 
 

 

 A warm welcome to each worshiper today. We celebrate you and offer you our friendship and love. We are a congregation of people who seek to grow spiritually, to become more like Christ in His compassion and acceptance of everyone while growing more aware of what it really means to be Christians today. 

 
 

As a Reconciling Congregation, EPUMC affirms the sacred worth of persons of all sexual orientations and gender identities and welcomes them into full participation in the fellowship, membership, ministries, and leadership of the congregation. 

  

943 Palmer Avenue, Schenectady, NY 12309 / 518-374-4306 epumc943@gmail.com / www.easternparkway.org 

 

Order of Worship 

December 18, 2022 

10:00 a.m. 

*You are invited to rise in body or spirit. 

  

Prelude  

Greeting and Announcements 

 
 

Mission Statement: 

We are a faith community striving to be, to nurture, and to send forth disciples of Jesus Christ. 

 
 

Lighting of the Advent Wreath: 

Reader 1: O God, we light the fourth candle of Advent. 

Reader 2: We hear your angel Gabriel and witness the faith of Mary. Fill us with your grace and light. 

Reader 1: Mary was a young, strong, spiritual woman. Even though her life was not easy, she heard God’s voice and said yes. Her song was a prayer that would uplift those who were downtrodden. Her lyrics shattered the proud and called the world to change. She would bear within her the promised child, Jesus, the Light of the World. This Advent, we respond to God’s beckoning to us as well. 

People : Revealing God, visit us and fill us with your Spirit. Bring your good news to life within us. Give us courage to carry your light into the injustices and shadows of this world. Amen. 

Call to Worship: 

We have been looking for a sign. 

Emmanuel—God with us. 

We have been waiting for a savior. 

Emmanuel—God with us. 

The time is near—can it be? 

Emmanuel—God with us. 

Come let us worship the God of sign, 

wonder, and promise. 

Let us worship God. Joanne Carlson Brown 

  

*Hymn Hark the Herald Angels Sing #240 

              

Prayer of Confession: 

O God, 

we are easily distracted and slightly jaded, 

and cannot believe Christ is almost here. 

There are still presents to be bought— 

never mind wrapped. 

There are parties to attend, cookies to be baked, 

trees to be trimmed. 

Sometimes we cannot wait 

until all this hubbub is over. 

Where is the time to sit, to sleep— 

never mind to dream? 

We can get so caught up in the busyness of the season 

that we miss the gift the season is meant to be. 

We have heard the scriptures and stories so often 

that they have become white noise. 

For our frenetic pace, for our exhaustion, 

for our tunnel vision, for our missing the wonder 

and awe of a baby born to fulfill promises 

made long ago, forgive us. 

Restore to us the sense of surprise 

that you came to us as a little baby, 

unexpected, yet longed for. 

God of the visioners and dreamers, 

may we always be ready 

to receive your gifts. Amen. 

  

Assurance: 

God comes to us in dreams and visions, 

in prophecies and affirmations, 

in longing and in hope, 

in salvation through a little child. 

Claim this promise for yourself, 

and let God's healing love fill you. 

 
 

Scripture Reading Matthew 1: 18-25 

The Birth of Jesus the Messiah 

18 Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah[a] took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be pregnant from the Holy Spirit. 19 Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to divorce her quietly. 20 But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” 22 All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet: 

23 “Look, the virgin shall become pregnant and give birth to a son, 
    and they shall name him Emmanuel,” 

which means, “God is with us.” 24 When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife 25 but had no marital relations with her until she had given birth to a son,[b] and he named him Jesus. 

 
 

Sermon What Is Love? 

Here, we are, friends: the final stretch. The fourth Sunday of Advent. If we put ourselves in the shoes of Mary, an expectant mother, then we’re in that third trimester, hard at work nesting—building a crib, installing the car seat on the donkey (which is how I imagine they transported babies back then), laundering the blankies and onesies, and making sure our health care provider has our birth plan. Little does Mary know just how swiftly that birth plan is getting chucked out the window, but we’ll get to that next week. 

This week, we’re digging into Matthew, and taking our focus temporarily off of Mary in order to focus on one of the most important men in Jesus’ earthly life: his dad, Joseph. As you’re about to hear, I’m very sympathetic to Joseph. For this sermon highlighting the World’s Best Dad, I’m bringing back some notes that I used for a sermon I delivered about him two years ago, in the lowly depths of the pandemic, that I had to deliver via a prerecorded YouTube message. For such a great man, these details deserve to be received again, this time by a live audience. 

For how important this man is to Jesus’s life and upbringing, as well as to the overall Good News story of the Gospels, we don’t know anywhere near as much as we’d like to about Jesus’ earthly dad, and even the things we think we do know are subject to debate. There’s two prevailing theories about Joseph’s age; one holds that Joseph was much older than Mary, that he had been married and widowed before, and had children with his first wife. That same theory maintains that Mary was ever a virgin throughout her life, that she had no biological children with Joseph, and that Jesus’ brothers and sisters referred to later on in the Gospels are Joseph’s children from his first marriage. I take the time to explain this to you partly because some of you may have grown up hearing this version of Jesus’ birth story in Sunday school, and partly because if you look at Joseph the way I will invite you to, his age, parental, and widower status are a big deal. 

The second theory about Joseph’s age is the one I personally adhere to: Joseph was a little older than Mary, in his late teens or early twenties, at the typical age of marriage for a young Jewish man of his time and place. He’s young enough that he hopefully has many years of life ahead of him (though the typical peasant lifespan was quite short in these days), but old enough that he has completed an apprenticeship under his father, has learned a trade (wood working), and is prepared to support a family. If this was Joseph’s first marriage, then he and Mary would have been betrothed as children, and their betrothal would have been a casual agreement between Joseph and Mary’s dads. When they got older, around the age that they presumably are at the beginning of Matthew’s Gospel, their betrothal would become a legal matter. Matthew tells us that Mary was “pledged to Joseph”, but that they weren’t living together yet. While in today’s society that might mean that Mary has a flashy diamond solitaire on her left ring finger and she and Joseph are busy planning a wedding, in First Century Palestine this means that Mary and Joseph have now signed their marriage contract, called the ketubah. They are now legally bound to one another, pending nothing but a marriage ceremony. If Joseph got cold feet, he would have to file for divorce from Mary. This also means that Joseph’s parents have paid a bride price to Mary’s parents, called the mohar. The mohar was an enormous amount of money, approximately the value of a small house. It was meant to “compensate” Mary’s parents for taking a daughter from them, as in this society Mary would cling to Joseph’s family after marriage and not be available to care for her aging parents. The mohar would also protect Mary if, heaven forbid, Joseph died young, or decided to divorce her. Without Joseph around to support her, Mary would depend on the mohar to provide for herself and her children. In addition, Joseph has at this point gifted Mary something called the mattan, a sum of money equal to a few months of pay. If Joseph backs out of the betrothal, or if he leaves her later on or passes away, the mattan is Mary’s to keep. 

That brings us to this morning’s story. All the work has been done, and Joseph, Mary, and both of their families have made tremendous commitments to this family that doesn’t even technically exist legally, financially, and in blood, sweat, and tears. Mary is for all intents and purposes Joseph’s wife, pending nothing but a wedding ceremony, which is doubtless all planned. But now, a completely unexpected turn of events threatens both families: Mary is pregnant. Since those drugstore tests weren’t invented yet, Mary must be rather far along for Joseph to know, to the point that she can no longer hide this pregnancy from anyone. This is a crisis for Joseph, and for Mary. We learn a ton about Joseph based on how Matthew tells us he had planned to handle this catastrophe before the angel talked to him, and though Matthew wraps it up in a few words, we need to understand that Joseph had decided to risk everything for Mary’s sake. Joseph decided to divorce Mary quietly. This goes way against local custom for such a situation as this. Since, prior to his dream, Joseph assumes Mary cheated on him, the Law is 100% on his side. “Divorcing Mary loudly” would mean publicly declaring Mary as an adulteress. The ketubah would be null and void. Mary and her parents would be required to pay back the mohar and the mattan, and live in financial ruin for the rest of their days. Mary would be labeled a harlot, and no respectable man would want to come anywhere near her ever again. She would live and die alone. If she has younger siblings, they would also have a very difficult time finding spouses with their family name tarnished. Joseph couldn’t live with that. So he decided instead that he was just going to say “you know what, never mind, I don’t want to get married right now.” The ketubah would be ripped up, and Joseph would be labeled an oath breaker. Mary and her family would keep the mohar and the mattan, and as a consequence Joseph and his family would be financially and socially ruined. Joseph was willing not only to take this outcome upon himself, but also upon his parents and younger siblings, even though he had done nothing wrong and he believed Mary had, just to spare Mary. 

I have a theory: what if God wasn’t originally going to keep Joseph in the picture? Afterall, God didn’t need Joseph to get Mary pregnant, so what does Mary really need a husband for? Maybe knowing Joseph’s heart, and learning that Joseph was going to sacrifice himself for Mary, was what made God change the divine mind and say “You know what—I’m going to keep that guy around. I think that’s exactly the kind of man Jesus needs in his life, the kind who will teach him about selfless love.” 

Who is the Joseph of your story? Who stayed by your side when they didn’t have to? Who supported you despite the voices in the peanut gallery telling them to run away? Who proved after a crisis that they were in this with you for the long haul? Treasure that person, because just by loving you they showed you the face of Jesus. 

Who needs you to be their Joseph? Who’s out there in the world somewhere, someone who doesn’t need you in order to live, but who needs you in order to thrive? Whose life could you bless just by being there even though you don’t have to be? Listen if a small angelic voice tells you to help them, because that’s your chance to bring Jesus to someone else. 

May it be so. 

Amen. 

 
 

*Hymn Beautiful Star of Bethlehem  

Led by the Front Porch Rockers 

 
 

Offering  

 
 

Offertory  

Chancel Choir 

 

*Doxology See projection Tune at #229 

*Prayer of dedication             

  

Pastoral Prayer and Lord’s Prayer 

 

Loving God - as we approach the day of Christ's birth help us to throw wide the doors of our hearts in preparation.  Help us to sense the importance of what happened so long ago when Mary was visited by the angel Gabriel, to remember the words of the angels and the prophets and the teachers of old, and to celebrate all the promises that you made through them.  Help us to take firm hold of the meaning of all these things and to know in the depths of our being that even now you are seeking to work in us and through us to fulfill the promises you have made....  Lord hear our prayer.... 

Lord - may this Christmas season be for us and for those around us a season of healing, may it be a season of hope and of love and of joy, may it be a time of true sharing and of rejoicing in all the earth....   Lord hear our prayer... 

We pray O God for those in need around us: for those who need a second birth, for those who need a tender touch and a healing word....   Lord, hear our prayer... 

We pray too, O God for the children of our world - and all those of tender faith, all those who have no home to call their home, all those who are hungry and thirsty.  Bless we pray the innocent of the earth and all those who trust in you.  Bless the humble and the powerless and bring down from their thrones those who full of pride and those who are indifferent... Lord, hear our prayer.... 

We ask these things O God, with hope and praise in our hearts, our minds, and our souls, through Christ Jesus our Lord, Amen. 

 
 

— written by Richard J. Fairchild, and posted on his Kir-shalom website. 

 

Our Father, Mother, Creator God, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who have trespassed against us. Lead us, not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the Kingdom, and the Power, and the Glory forever. Amen. 

 

*Hymn O Little Town of Bethlehem #230 

 
 

Benediction 

 
Postlude  

 

Staff 

Natalie Bowerman Pastor 

Betsy Lehmann Music Director 

Joe White Custodian 

Cassandra Brown Nursery Attendant